Kim Jong Il Death Leaves Vacuum in Crazy Evil Villian Community.
Birds of a feather: Legendary villians gather for “Dear Leader’s” death
PYONGYANG- The flag of North Korea is at half mass, mourning the death of their “Dear Leader” Kim Jong Il. The same holds for the flags of Latveria, ruled by Victor Von Doom and Skeletor’s Castle in Eternia. In fact the celebrities who formally declared their mourning were numerous and sundry, and all completely out of their minds. The planets largest collector of pornography (Bin Laden a close second), and the architect behind the empty city just north of the DMZ was officially declared dead.
Conservative Hippyism’s Korean Peninsula desk was inundated by calls after the announcement. According to correspondent, Jeet Kun Do, no less than a dozen of the most respected and feared and evil genius leaders and despots called to offer comments and condolences. Conservative Hippyism has exclusive content from these internationally recognized personalities. A special release will be coming soon.
Political analysts are not sure who will fill the void left by “Dear Leader” and many are assuming that is the reason for the sudden outpour of support and condolences from these notable criminal masterminds.
A wreath was sent with an accompanying card by The Galactic Empire of the Sith.; The Pride of Bad Lions led by Scar from the Lion King gathered around the family home and after feeding on some of the locals, offered some of the smaller lions as rugs. The Joker, Lex Luthor and Darkseid ruler of Apokolips have all visited the home of the Kim family, (Jong Il Family?) and according to onlookers, offering many different bribes in return for a shot at the crown. Professor Moriarty, noted trickster and necromancer seems to have won the most favor with the interim government, and emerged from the family palace with no witnesses having remembered him ever arriving. Oddly, the Arrival of 80’s teen star Corey Haim has yet to be explained.
“The official cause of death,” announced royal family practitioner Dr. Evil, “is not auto-erotic asphyxiation, not that anyone asked, throw me a frikkin bone here, ask the question.”
The circle of fame aside, the account of Kim Jong Il’s death has not been publicized, yet.
Our own Jeet Kun Do will be reporting back as soon as the details have been produced, and spoon fed to the press.