SAMCRO Premier Beats RNC, DNC. Biden Guest Stars. An unedited, unpublished submission to The Washington Fancy
CHARMING, CA– After photographs of VP BIden hanging with BIkers and and letting an Ol’ Lady sit on his lap surfaced, FX figured out a good way to boost ratings. Joe Biden guest starred on The Season premier of Sons of Anarchy. Playing a showy, poorly spoken, publicly awkward and painfully oblivious lawyer with a penchant for political gaffes and outrageous claims, The Veep said later, “It was a role I had to really study for, there were a few lines. Otherwise I slid right in.” The lawyer role on the hit FX show was specifically written in by FX execs. FX is an offshoot of the FOC corporation, not a friend to the current Admin. To many, the invite was a shock.
Joe Biden is well known for his reputation as a renaissance man and hollywood demeanor. According to The Fancy’s Washington insiders, unnamed to protect our sources, Joe Biden has been preparing for this cameo for a while. Pictures of him kissing women and being flirty with biker babes, saying stupid things and acting aloof, were all just part of his studying for the part. “Putting him in the role of Vice President, now that was a stretch,” Johnny “Three-Thumbs” Flagler -Technical advisor to Sons told The Fancy. “He walked right into the role on our show, in fact he ad-libbed most of the greasy-lawyer-turned-bumbling-politician-stuff, we just gave him a motorcycle club vest and a pair of sunglasses. Hell, he even brought the women with him.” One Intrawebs rumor has postulated that Biden didn’t even know the cameras were rolling, he just nailed the bit naturally-unsubstantiated.
The fact that the cameo was unannounced, and the premier still beat the RNC, and DNC ratings, leads may pundits and campaign strategists to wonder if the two parties need to toughen their images, accept more freedom loving lifestyles, and start rooting for underdogs. The Show, which goes by the shortened name, SAMCRO (Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club Redwood Original) has prompted alternative biker names for the two part system as well. The RNC fans have begun creating Leather vests and Re-tagging themselves as SAMRep while Democrat fans have adopted DemCRO. The Libertarian crowd seems to already make up a large percentage of the outlaw biker community and responded to the survey with, “Fuck Your Two-Party-System!”